THE DEATH OF JESUS

At the age of 33, Jesus was condemned to death.

At the time, crucifixion was the "worst" death. Only the worst criminals were condemned to be crucified.

Yet, it was even more dreadful for Jesus, for unlike other criminals condemned to death by crucifixion, Jesus was nailed to the cross by His hands and feet, rather than tied.

Each nail was 6 to 8 inches long.

The nails were driven into His wrist. Not into His palms as is commonly portrayed. There's a tendon in the wrist that extends to the shoulder. The Roman guards knew that when the nails were being hammered into the wrist, that tendon would tear and break, forcing Jesus to use His back muscles to support himself, so that He could breathe.

Both of His feet were nailed together. Thus, He was forced to support Himself on the single nail that impaled His feet to the cross.

Jesus could not support himself with His legs for long because of the pain, so He was forced to alternate between arching His back and using his legs just to continue to breath.

Imagine the struggle, the pain, the suffering, the courage.

Jesus endured this reality for over 3 hours.

A few minutes before He died, Jesus stopped bleeding. He was simply pouring water from his wounds.

From common images, we see wounds to His hands and feet and even the spear wound to His side. But do we remember the many wounds made to his body.

A hammer driving large nails through the wrists, the feet overlapped and a nail hammered through the arches, then a Roman guard piercing His side with a spear.

And before the nails and the spear, Jesus was whipped and beaten.

The whipping was so severe that it tore the flesh from His body.

The beating so horrific that His face was torn and his beard ripped from His face.

The crown of thorns (two to three inch thorns) cut deeply into His scalp.

Most men would not have survived this torture.

He had no more blood to bleed out, only water poured from His wounds.

All these without mentioning the humiliation He passed after carrying His own cross for almost 2 kilometers, while the crowd spat in his face and threw stones. The cross beam was almost 30 kg of weight, to which His hands were nailed.

Jesus had to endure this experience, so that you may have free access to God.

So that your sins can be "washed" away.

All of them, with no exception!

Jesus Christ died for you.

EASTER....

Easter is the most important annual religious feast in the Christian liturgical year. According to the Bible, Jesus was resurrected from the dead on the third day after his crucifixion. Christians celebrate this resurrection on Easter Day or Easter Sunday (also Resurrection Day or Resurrection Sunday), two days after Good Friday and three days after Maundy Thursday, also referred to as Holy Thursday by some.

The Resurrected Jesus appearing before Mary Magdelene

The chronology of his death and resurrection is variously interpreted to be between AD 26 and AD 36. Easter also refers to the season of the church year called Eastertide or the Easter Season. Traditionally the Easter Season lasted for the forty days from Easter Day until Ascension Day but now officially lasts for the fifty days until The first week of the Easter Season is known as Easter Week or the Octave of Easter. Easter also marks the end of Lent, a season of fasting, prayer, and penance.

Just the other day, Tasha and I were having dinner with Ben, Kamal, Vixx & Komathi. Ben & Kamal asked me a question: "So Devan aren't you observing Lent this year?" It was nice that they remembered. Every year, I give up something for Lent - normally something I cannot live without. For the past years it has been, alcohol, red meat, in fact in one of those years, it was meat altogether - but this year, I gave up coffee. Ever since I started here in CSC, I have been drinking at least 2 mugs of coffee every morning. So, this is something I have decided to give up. Honestly, it was tough initially, but eventually, I am alright. There is no longer a craving.

Tasha and I will be going back to Melaka on Thursday, right after work and we will be attending Good Friday service in Christ Church Melaka. Amma has promised to cook up a delicious vegetarian meal - yummy! I can't wait. To those of you who read the post last year, I'm sure you saw the spread - the works ya'll :) I have requested a menu from Amma - so, I am looking forward to it. Will post the pictures by Saturday, 3rd.

That's all for now, more after the Good Friday service.

Ode To My Dear 'Sons'

Every day when I return home from work, Caesar and Vasco are always there to greet me. Caesar will be running up and down the drive way with a soft toy in his mouth and Vasco will be whining in anticipation so that I will just pat him and give him a regular belly rub. It is amazing that the both of them are there to greet both Tasha and me every day without fail. There hasn't been a day go by, with them not greeting us the way they do. Cute fellers - I always look forward to going back home just to see them greet and welcome the both of us - very enthusiastically.

Caesar

Vasco

Love you both Caesar and Vasco

This posting is specially dedicated to the both of you - woof woof!

Below are some of the most famous animal quotes compiled from many people. Enjoy...

"An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language" ~ Martin Buber

"We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals" ~ Immanual Kant

"My little dog -- a heartbeat at my feet" ~ Edith Wharton

"Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes!" ~ Theophile Gautier

"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole" ~ Roger Caras

"You think dogs will not be in heaven? I tell you, they will be there long before any of us" ~ Robert Louis Stevenson

"A dog is the only thing on earth that will love you more than you love yourself" ~ Josh Billings

"Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened" ~ Anatole France

"Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to" ~ Joe Gores

"There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face" ~ Ben Williams

"To err is human, to forgive, canine" ~ Anonymous

"The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated" ~ Mahatma Gandhi

"Every boy should have two things: a dog, and a mother willing to let him have one" ~ Anonymous

"A dog has lots of friends because he wags his tail and not his tongue" ~ Anonymous

"The dog represents all that is best in man" ~ Etienne Charlet

"The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself, too" ~ Samuel Butler

"I care not for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it" ~ Abraham Lincoln

"If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer" ~ Alfred North Whitehead

"The best thing about animals is that they don't talk much" ~ Thornton Wilder

and the best of it all....

"...he will be our friend for always and always and always" ~ Rudyard Kipling

Family Trip

Tasha and I have been planning to have a family trip for a long time. We have been planning to have the trip since early September 09. Thankfully, everyone responded on time and kept the date free. The date was set be on the 2nd of Jan 2010. A one night trip to PD. We made the necessary arrangements to have a bungalow booked and pot luck was also organized. We wanted to have a barbeque so we had to ensure sufficient food was catered for the 23 people & 2 furkids that came:-

1. Devan, Tasha, Caesar & Vasco (2)
2. Uncle Krishnasamy, Auntie Lalitha, Pravina & Suhashini (4)
3. Thatha (1)
4. Uncle John, Auntie Rani, Hans & Natasha (4)
5. Uncle Revee, Auntie Chelva, Arwin & Sharwin (4)
6. Kumar, Pathma, Aniruth & Adhiti (4)
7. Vicknes & Yoges (2)
8. Alfred & Geeta (2)

By God’s grace everything went on well. We left KL at 12.50noon and we were in PD by 2.00pm. The entourage from Melaka arrived at about 2.30pm. We started off by having some deliciously made nasi lemak by mom-in-law (Aunt Lalitha). Once we were done with lunch, we left for the beach. It was just a 5 mins walk from the bungalow. We swam in the sea for about 3 hours and then got back to prepare for the barbeque.

Barbeque started at 8.00pm and by then, Alfred, Geeta and the Kumars had just arrived. Oh yes, how can I forget? We had problems finding the barbeque grill. We could buy it from KL because; we did not know the size of the barbeque pit in the bungalow. We spent a good 1 hour looking for it, and finally we found one shop that had it. As soon as we got it and all the other supplies, we headed straight to the bungalow. After we were done with eating and drinking, we had a short game of football – really fun. 2 teams of 5 aside were made and we played for a good 1 hour. Then, we stopped to rest. But after resting, no one wanted to continue, so all of us had our showers and we started card games. Some gambled, some of us played Citadel – a game introduced by Vicky & Yoges. Interesting, I must say. After that, the rest went to sleep, but some of us continued with Monopoly and more drinking. 3 of us (Arwin, Hans and me) only slept at 5.30am – after some supper.

Got up by 8.00am the next morning and yes you guessed it right, we headed to the beach again. Swam for about 3 hours, got home, bathed, got ready, some of us had light lunches and then we all headed back to KL.

All in all a very good trip – some of us came from KL, some from Melaka, some from Singapore and some even from India. I am very glad everyone had a good time. We are planning to make this an annual event – even bi-annual, of course only if the response is good.

Pictures of the trip can be viewed by clicking on the picture below:

Say 'No To Plastic Bags'

Greetings of the New Year everyone!

I came across a very good article in the NST this morning on the ‘No Plastic Bag’ campaign.

Every Saturday (from the 2nd of Jan onwards) in all Carrefour hypermarts nationwide, no plastic bags will be given to customers – if they would like to have one, they will have to purchase it.

This is a very good move. Tasha and I have always been wondering when people will ever stop using plastic bags. This is the beginning. We should encourage shoppers to use their own recyclable shopping bags. It is also good to know that other supermarkets and convenience stores have also decided to follow suit. In fact, Cold Storage had already declared Thursdays as a ‘no plastic bag day’. Now, they have also decided to take part in the campaign. Among the other stores who have decided to follow suit, 7-11 and Giant. I do hope other marts will do the same.

Please spread the message everyone. Please go into stores with your own reusable shopping bags. Let’s join hands in saving the environment. Let us start off the New Year by inculcating the habit of recycling.

Thank you and God bless you all this year!

Caesar & Vasco....

It is such a joy to have Caesar and Vasco in our lives. I was just watching some tele after dinner and I realised that Caesar (for 5 years) and Vasco (for 3 years) have been with us throughout our entire lives together. I can still remember the day Tasha brought Caesar home. The memories of that day are still very fresh in my mind. He was a ball of fur. I have seen many pups growing up. I must say, Caesar was the best of them all. He was very well behaved. He is 5 years old (35 human years). Vasco will be 3 years old (21 human years) this October. It is sad to note that dogs do not live as long as humans do. I just hope and pray that both Caesar and Vasco will live their lives to the fullest. I pray that the both of them will remain healthy.

Here are some of their pictures taken recently:-

Caesar watching tv

Vasco eating (he is known as the 'sappadu raman of the house')

US Open....

I was watching the semi finals of the women's singles match of the US Open. Well, not the one between Wozianicki & Wickmayer, but the one between Williams and Clijsters. Well, at least now you know what is it I am getting at. What a match it was? Kim was leading by 1 game to 0 (6-4). In the second set, when it was 40-15 to Clijsters, something really bizarre happened on the court. Serena was serving when she was given a service fault by the line judge. She went mad - as in completely mad. She went on a foul mouth tirade at the line judge.

The line judge was called by the umpire to explain the call and when she did, the Chief Judges of the tournament were called in.

Serena was given a point penalty, hence, Clijsters won the match.


A night full of drama at the Arthur Ashe Stadium.

Serena was given the point penalty for unsportsmanlike conduct. This was the first time I have seen such a player (Clijsters) get a place in a Grand Slam final for unsportsmanlike conduct of the opposition player (Williams). I hope this incident serves as a lesson to all sportsmen and women to be good role models on and off the court.

So stay cool on the field of play everyone :)

Pictures courtesy of www.USOpen.org

Caesar & Vasco....

Every now and then, Caesar and Vasco have this wrestling sessions. It is so cute to see them going at each other. Tasha and I were watching tele this morning and playing with the boys. Suddenly Caesar got into a minor rage and started going at Vasco. He started his 'cari pasal' mode.

Do watch the video below:

Weekend....

It is a strange feeling when you look forward to the weekend. But when the weekend comes, you're like thinking, damn, it is Monday in a day or two. Then you lose all focus of the weekend. Anyway, this weekend was rather quiet. Woke up early this morning, ran some errands, took Vasco to the vet and Caesar to the groomers. Then, got back. Tasha cooked lunch. Lovely lunch I must say - chicken curry, rice, carrots and cauliflowers. In fact, once I got back upon running my errands, I slept for a while. It has been like eternity since I ever had a good afternoon nap, and boy was it good. Woke up and 6.00pm and had lunch. Yup - lunch was at 6.00pm. Then, Xavier called me for a game of pool. We were supposed to go for a bowling session in Sunway Pyramid - but it didn't work out. We had vouchers for some games - but sadly, it didn't work out. Anyway, I headed to IOI Mall - Brewball to play some pool. I must say, Brewball has one of the best tables in town. Well maintained and excellence service by the staff. We played for a good 2 hours - 8 ball. We hope to be having another round of 9 ball soon. It was a well contested match: Devan - 10 vs Xavier - 8.

After the games, I got back, had another round of the rice and chicken curry. Bought some ice-cream back. Tasha and I have this love affair with the McDonald's Cornetto Sundae. Good stuff ya'll. Try it - chocolate though, not the strawberry one. After dinner, had ice-cream and then watched some tele. I wanted to catch the ManUtd v Spurs game, but I doubt I'll be able to stay awake. I need to be up in the morning tomorrow as Tasha and I are driving Appa and Amma to Slim River - one of my dad's episcopal visits. They're driving to the Petronas here in Sg.Besi and then, I'm driving them to S.River. It will be a nice trip for sure as it will be the first time Appa will be going back to his place of birth and his 'kampung' as a Bishop. After the service, I'll be driving them straight to Melaka. Shobs and Balla are in Melaka, so they'll be dropping us off at KL on their way back.

Once we get back, it will already be time to get ready for a new week ahead. Wish you all a pleasant weekend and more to come next week.

I hope to take some picture in Slim River and I'll post it once I get back.

God bless you all.

RACISM....

I have had my run-ins with blatant racism. However, here in Malaysia, we are very careful in approaching the subject of racism. Why? Are we worried that mere questioning will result in a racial riot? I personally feel that if we see or experience racism, we should publicise it. People should be aware of how sickening some can be.

I was reading through the blog of one of my closest buddies (in fact he was also one of my best man) - Vixx. Vixx and I go a long way back. We've been very close - almost family, but only more genuine ;) He had written a post on racism - his unfortunate experiences. I think everyone here in Malaysia must read it. You need to know what is happening here in Malaysia - sadly.

To go to the article, please click on the 'No Racism' signage below:

US Open....

Yes, it is this time of the year! I always look forward to the Grand Slams. Although my favourite is the Wimbledon, there is something about the US Open that keeps me glued to the tele every year. I suppose it is my love for the sport of tennis. It was sad to see my favourite women's player get knocked out of the tournament in the 2nd round, Ana Ivanovic. However, I'm glad Roger is still kicking it this year. I'm glad he is back at his best. Somehow, I still feel that the best of Federer is yet to come. It should be a a good match between himself and Hewitt in the 3rds. Most of the seeded players have all gone through to the next round (Nadal, Serena, Blake, etc.) - with the exception of Amelie Mauresmo who was knocked out by Alexandre Wozniak of Canada, 6-4, 6-0. Daamnnnn!

I was on the US Open site and I came across one of the most interesting pictures ever. The security officers at the tournament have their respective K9 officers as well. This fellow is so cute. He even had a security tag made for him. Interesting to see how detailed security is in such a major tournament.

Eating Healthy....

I was reading an article on how to eat healthy. I have this problem. I want to eat healthy, but I never knew how to do so without giving up on my favourite desserts (well, some of them at least). Here is how. I have managed to compile the list below based on our own diet. I want to eat healthy - especially with my family having a long history of diabetes and high blood pressure. So here goes:-

Eat Enough Calories But Not Too Many

Maintain a balance between your calorie intake and calorie expenditure—that is, don't eat more food than your body uses. The average recommended daily allowance is 2,000 calories, but this depends on your age, sex, height, weight, and physical activity.

Eat A Wide Variety Of Foods

Healthy eating is an opportunity to expand your range of choices by trying foods—especially vegetables, whole grains, or fruits—that you don't normally eat.

Keep Portions Moderate

Especially, high-calorie foods. In recent years serving sizes have ballooned, particularly in restaurants. Choose a starter instead of an entrée, split a dish with a friend, and don’t order supersized anything.

Eat Plenty Of Fruits, Vegetables, Grains, And Legumes

Foods high in complex carbohydrates, fiber, vitamins, and minerals, low in fat, and free of cholesterol. Try to get fresh, local produce.

Drink More Water

Our bodies are about 75% water. It is a vital part of a healthy diet. Water helps flush our systems, especially the kidneys and bladder, of waste products and toxins. A majority of Malaysians go through life dehydrated – and to make matters worse, we don’t even know it. So please drink plenty of water.

Limit Sugary Foods, Salt, & Refined-Grain Products

Sugar is added to a vast array of foods. In a year, just one daily 12-ounce can of soda (160 calories) can increase your weight by 16 pounds. See suggestions below for limiting salt and substituting whole grains for refined grains.

Don’t Be The Food Police

You can enjoy your favorite sweets and fried foods in moderation, as long as they are an occasional part of your overall healthy diet. Food is a great source of pleasure, and pleasure is good for the heart – even if those French fries aren’t! I know of some friends who avoid ‘sin’ food at all cost. Well, that is not the way to do it. It is fine to have them once in a while.

Get Moving

A healthy diet improves your energy and feelings of well-being while reducing your risk of many diseases. Adding regular physical activity and exercise will make any healthy eating plan work even better. Yup, hence, the re-launching of the tennis sessions (for me at least) and the futsal sessions (next week onwards). Yes, Xavier, I know, I will come for the tennis sessions from now on.

Good Weekend....

What a weekend it was? The weekend started for me on Friday. Tasha picked me up from work, came back, did some shopping, packed up the boys and we left for Melaka. We were initially worried about the traffic (as Monday as a PH), but thankfully, the traffic was very smooth. We got to Melaka in an hour and 20 mins. Amma was waiting for us, had a warm shower and slept. Woke up the next morning, had breakfast, watched tele and just chilled at home. Appa and Amma went for a picnic with the Senior Citizens Club of CCM - so Tasha and I had lunch and pretty much just lazed at home. It was nice to just be at home. In the afternoon, we headed to Jln Bunga Raya for some cendol and rojak. This shop that we went to brings special memory to Tasha - when she was a kid, her grandma used to take her to this shop for rojak and cendol after their grocery shopping every other Saturday. To our suprise, the old uncle who is managing the shop is still there with his wife. According to Tasha, the taste has not changed - ever! So, it was good - I had longan with ice-cream - nice. Anyway, after that, we headed to buy some fruits and wash the car and then headed back home.

We visited Tasha's auntie (Uncle, Hans & Natasha) in Bukit Katil and then headed home after the 2nd half of the Man Utd v Arsenal game - were we lucky, I'm very sure we were. Although we did play well in the second half, but the way the goals came in for us, I have to thank God for his blessings :) Anyway, we retired right after the game as we were going to Kluang on Sunday. We woke up at 6.30am, got ready and headed to Kluang. Tasha and I slept at the back while Appa and Amma drove. We got to Kluang at 9am, dropped Appa at St. Luke's and then we (Amma, Tasha and I) headed to the Kluang town for some old school breakfast. Seriously very good. There is this chinese coffee shop in Kluang which serves the best baked bread with butter and kaya and coffee. After bfast, we went to church. Right after church service, we left - Appa was conducting the confirmation for some 10 candidates. I drove us back to Melaka - once we got back, we bought some lunch from Selvams.

After lunch, bathed the boys - Tasha bathed Caesar and I bathed Vasco. Fed them and then we slept for a while. Only woke up at about 8pm at night, got ready and left for KL. at about 9.30pm. It was a smooth drive back. Got in to KL by 11pm. Bought some burgers back and now I'm just resting. About to go and sleep in a bit. Tasha is already sleeping. In fact, I wanted to go and shoot some pool with Xav, but he isn't keeping too well, so we'll go tomorrow morning (I hope).

Very eventful weekend - Celtic won, Man Utd won and we had a very relaxed weekend in Melaka and Kluang.

Stray Dogs....

Tasha & I were going back home after dinner sometime last week in Equine Park sometime last week and we were greeted by a very cute Lab looking black colour stray. She was blocking the road as were about the leave the restaurant. So, what we did was we drove back to where she came from and we were pleasantly greeted by 2 small pups and 2 other strays as well. They were all sitting together and keeping themselves warm. A very sad site for an animal lover - I tell you. Anyway, we headed to buy some dog biscuits for them and ever since we have been feeding them at the shop lots that they normally chill out in.

However, today was kinda strange. When we went to feed the fellers, we only saw one of them. He was just sitting there alone - looking sad and cold (it has been raining here for the past 2 weeks, especially at night). So, what I did was, the usual, trying to call all of them - no one came. I got a bit worried - then this feller was walking away as I was pouring out the food on the old newspapers which were already there (I guess there were others feeding them too). Then, he gave 2 loud barks. As soon as he barked, all the dogs whom I had been feeding all this while, came running - including the 2 small pups. It was so cute - all of them just ran around our car and up into the shop lot. In fact when Spots (the dog that was sitting there alone) called out to his homies to come and feast, one of the small pups was about to run across the road - an oncoming car was about to hit him - but he took a step back and avoided the car. Amazing aren't they - they are so smart isn't? I was truly touched by how Spots called out to all of them to come and eat. Poor fellers were so hungry.

This post is to tell everyone - dogs are precious beings. Do not abuse them, do not throw them out of your house once you get bored of them, do not give them up if you have a child at home and most importantly - PLEASE, for heavens sake, if you are not in a position to care for them, do not ever and I mean, ever take them into your homes in the first place. It is very cruel to care for them for a while and then just give them up later. To those who have pets of your own, please neuter or spay your dogs and cats. It is already depressing enough to see so many of them without loving homes.

To all my dear strays (dogs and cats) - this is my prayer for you - may you be kept very safe from all danger and may you be fed sufficiently.

Take care everyone and have a good weekend!

My BIG Day....

This post is long overdue (a month and a week). I know, I know - but I have been very busy with work. I have finally ended my bachelor days and I am happy to have married the love of my life, Tasha better known to many as Tharsani. As most of you know, it was on the 11th of July 2009 (Saturday). The wedding was held in Christ Church, Melaka and the reception was by the poolside of Everly Resort Hotel, Melaka. There are so many people I would like to thank for all the hard work put in making the day a beautiful day for us. So here goes:-

First and foremost our dear Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ for all His blessings
Both our parents (Rt. Rev Datuk Dr S Batumalai & Datin Elizabeth and Mr. Krishnasamy & Mrs. Lalitha)
My dear sister Shobanam and my beloved brother in law Balla - for everything the both of them did. The entire wedding would not have been possible without the both of you.
My dear brother Antho - for arranging the PA system and for ensuring everything went on smoothly at the reception.
To both our dear cousins for ensuring everyone had a seat at the reception - Reena, Angela, Heric, Sharmini, Risberg, Joanne, Natasha, Suhasini, Pravina and Hans
The Bishop of West Malaysia, Rt. Rev. Ng Moon Hing and his lovely wife
Mr. Benjy Ong and Mrs. Grace Chung - for the Church decorations and for the ushering
Our dear aunties at CCM (Aunt Helen Siow, Aunt Rosemary Gill, Aunt Lisa Yeo & Aunt Dorothy Chia) - wonderful flower arrangements in the Church
Ms. Cindy & Ms. Sharon - beautiful decorations by the poolside. Yes everyone, it was all done by these 2 ladies and they were assisted by my dear friends Gopi & Kohilah below
Mr. Gopinath and Ms. Kohilah - thank you so much for all your help at the Hotel - I am sorry that because of all the work you guys were doing in the Hotel, you were not able to attend the wedding ceremony.
My dear bestmen - Remyjit (Pau, thank you so much for allowing us to use your car as the Groom's car - thank you very much. And thank you for all your support to me personally), Kamal, Vikhram and Vicknesharajan (What a stag! Nuff said!) And for organising the bar after the reception - well done fellers! Love you all very much
To Tasha's bridesmaids - Debbie, Patricia, Shobanam and Geeta
Our dear Matron of Honour - Mrs. Mary Dass (yes, I was the page boy at Mary Akka's wedding)
My dear Arwin and Hans for organising the signages
My dear comrades Navindran @ Naevien and Xavier Tee for ensuring the presentation slides went on well at the reception (I'm so sorry for not thanking you guys at the reception - I still feel bad about it)
My dear Jamhari - for the beautiful song you presented at the Church (It was truly special to the both of us Jam, I thank you so much - I know it wasn't easy)
My dear brother in law, Alfred for allowing us to use his car as the wedding car on such short notice - we thank you from the bottom of our hearts
My best friend, Goutham Ravi, affectionately known to me as G' - although you were unable to make it, I am glad you were with us in prayer. Hope to see you soon.

And not forgetting members of both of families and our dear friends (most of whom have come from out of town) to grace our special occasion and of course to help us out in one way or another.

To view the pictures, please click on our picture below:

INDIANS....

An interesting observation....

Statistics have been compiled, research has been conducted, relatives have been consulted, the gossip aunties (their big hips clad in colourful and bright golden sarees) have actually, for ONCE agreed. We present to you the characteristics that classify the THREE major Indian groups that exist in Malaysia. The REGULARs, HIP-HOPPERs & MACHAs.

(1) REGULAR

Definition:
Comprises a mere 7-10 % of the total population of Indians in Malaysia. Found in well-developed parts of the cities spread throughout the peninsular. (None have been found in Sabah & Sarawak as yet)

Characteristics:
1. Speaks English as their 1st language.(No shame at all)
2. Do not know how to (or just don’t) speak their mother tongue.
3. Prefer to identify themselves by sub-group rather than the plain Indian (ie-Malayalee, Ceylonese, Telugu, Sikh, North Indian, etc)
4. Uses the internet more than the other 2 groups combined.
5. Swears off, criticises and ridicule those who watch tamil/hindi movies and/or dramas
6. Instead, watches the OC, MTV and other American sitcoms
7. Thinks that the REGULAR group is way larger than it actually is and constantly makes fun of the other groups, in particular the MACHA group. Why? Because it's fun.
8. Aspires to be a doctor. Those who do medicine will eventually do so at UK/Australia, but will normally end up taking more than the required six years to complete the degree due to excessive failure.

Recent studies have shown that there is a growing splinter group within the REGULARs knows as the IPWTTANI (Indian People Who Think They Are Not Indians). This growing sub-group is considered the elitist by some and is found to make the occasional statements like "I wish I were in the UK " and/or "This never happened when I was studying in Australia ". They often speak in unidentifiable accents. The women/men of this group also prefer to date white men/women from foreign countries with the excuse that local men/women "just don't understand me". Many secretly desire to be taken away to live in a Bollywood film with a happily-ever- after ending.

(2) THE HIP-HOPPERS

Definition:
The 2nd major group of Indians, the HIP-HOPPERS comprises about 20-30% of the population of Indians. Normally living in urban areas of cities, the HIP-HOPPERS, as their name suggests, can never be found where they actually come from, but rather in clubs, bars, pubs etc. Many secretly desire to be like the REGULARS but just don't make the cut.

Characteristics:
1. TRY to speak English as their 1st language.
2. Their actual 1st language is Tamil.
3. Openly desire to be blacks (waddap dawg?)
4. Hair not in original colour
5. Have unknown hand movements and slangs that are supposedly cool that supposedly go well together with their normal attire of FUBU jerseys and baggy jeans (that are more often than not bought in Petaling Street/ChowKit)
6. Are famously known to shorten their names to suit their lifestyles (ie. Sam, for Muthusamy and Amber for Ambikadevi)
7. Large quantities (almost all) found in Jalan Telawi of Bangsar (though, to be fair, many REGULAR groups are found here too) 8. Parents want them to be doctors. Many end up studying medicine in Russia/Ukraine because they refuse to go to India and cannot afford UK/Australia. Those who go to India may eventually switch camps to the MACHA group.

The HIP-HOPPERS major claim to fame is driving out all the REGULARs (Malay, Chinese & Indian) and the white expatriates from Bangsar by large quantities, so much so that they can now call Bangsar "home".

(3) MACHAs

Definition:
The last and largest group of Indians in the country comes from the MACHA group. Probably the most famous group, it is so well known that most Malaysians think ALL Indians are from the MACHA group. Comprising nearly 70% of the Indian population in M'sia, the MACHAS can be found in urban parts of the cities, and also in estates.

Characteristics:
1. Speaks Tamil as their 1st language
2. Sees Tamil Nadu/Madras (India) as the place to be.
3. Astro at home is hardwired to Astro Vaanavil.
4. Worship Bollywood films. The men openly desire to be like Vijayakanth or their favourite Indian star.
5. A night-out will have to include a stop at any Indian shop in Brickfields. The shopping haven will have to be Jalan Masjid India .
6. Know all the Tamil songs by heart and has never heard of Hitz.FM
7. For men, outfit is never complete without a gold chain. Women prefer to spend their life-savings on gold jewelry and gaudy sarees.8. Half of them aspire to be doctors; the other half, their parents want them to be doctors. The bright ones become the pride of all Indians in the country when they enter UM for medicine, the less fortunate go to AIMST. Many more attain paradise and have their dreams come true when allowed to go off to India (most of the time Manipal) to do medicine. Most just drop-out of school and contribute to social-problem areas in the country.

Which one are you?